A poem written for my family by a close friend mourning alongside us
Let it make you softer
Until you twist and bend
Into a shape you’ve not known yet
This shape, she’ll be your friend.
She’ll show you hope
That sweet old pain
That promises to birth
The things held deep inside you
that beg to be unearthed.
She’ll take you into moments
You couldn’t have foreseen.
She’ll guide you through the lows,
The valleys and ravines.
Oh, those ravines
How treacherous they can be
Filled with sorrow, loss and grief
They can leave you on your knees.
She’ll teach you to weather moments
With space and grace and truth
Soaked with the longing for
The past to be here, too.
The past whose face you knew so well,
Your fingers drew it in their sleep.
A past you so tenderly grew,
To be yours, to keep.
That past Who made you laugh so hard, he’d often make you cry.
The past who called you dad and mama
And just for you, he tried
To make you proud of his tender heart
His strong arms and mind
A faithful and loyal friend,
no better could you find.
that stubborn, stubborn Present
That thinks better than to care.
That Present left your hands empty
and your future, too bare.
Yet then, even here,
I hope that you will find
That the pain has made you tender
And the loss has made you kind.
The love has left you melted,
Softening those lines.
The lines that keep you separate
From those who’ve wished you near.
Being present in “here” moments
Not giving into fears.
Don’t give in
In those moments
With the pain you cannot bare
When the suffering is so acute
You feel it everywhere
Until you’re just a big patch of pain
Unknowing where to go and
How to make it through tomorrow.
The loss, we give it back
Please take with it, the pain
of losing his future and his kindness
How great did heaven gain
A boy who saw
the needs of others, plain as day.
His joyous heart to meet them
With his Father’s heart displayed.
How do we join
These two ideas
Of hope and of pain
Of suffering and sorrow
And grief, it’s demands, remain
With joy and hope and kindness
And the future with today
With all that’s good and holy
But broken and decayed.
But this, somehow, sweet love
Is where you will find
The light that breaks the shadows
And fills up the skies.
That my peace and my comfort
With love, combine
To make a sweet trinity
That lasts the stretch of time.
So take that promise
And hold it tight
To walk with you through heartbreaking days,
and then, those harrowing nights.
And then my sweet, my dear,
Forget this not, please try.
Remind your heart, your mind and bones,
To not bury where you lie
And that passion
That’s molded you to might
Mobilized you everyday
With kindness that shines bright
So warm on all our faces
Beckoning what’s good and right.
So take these things
Pain, grace, truth
And Know that you are fought for
And in the quiet moments
Of this treacherous terrain
Know that here, I am with you
Forever, to remain.
let it leave you softer.
By Emily Anne Kyle